Recently I'm spending time on Ted Talks/ideas, some topics highly call me because of my experiences, things I lived... I really feel the need to share it and talk about it. Some of these are about finding our calling, our professional vocation. Dave Isay says, “People who’ve found their calling have a fire about them”. Ask you this question, when you go to work every morning, do you feel that fire ? I imagine most people will answer, “Of course I don’t”. Don’t you think that you deserve better ? Why not ?
For a better understanding of my post, I suggest you this 3 articles/videos :
- 7 lessons about finding the work you were meant to
- How to find work you love
- Why some of us don’t have one true calling
This last five years, I saw in my circle of friends or family, more and more students or young adults totally lost, unable to find their own path. They give up studies they started, they change 2 or 3 times the studies they have started, they change after almost 2 years of experiences in their work to do something completely different. Globally they don’t feel well and they don’t find the place where they belong. Why ? I can assure you that they are not lazy people, often motivated and passionate. They have potential but they didn't find the place where to show it.
So, where is the problem ? First comes first, the problem is certainly not them.
Education and orientation
I don’t know how it works in other countries but I remember when I was in high school and you have to choose your orientation and in which university you will go last year. I didn’t have any fucking idea, I didn’t even know what a job was. How can I choose my future ? Plus, I basically hated all the stuff we learn in high school (history, geographic, maths, economy, etc.). In France, we have some “orientation advisors” who suck so hard. Without exaggeration there was some test for the "lost kids", the results were : “you like animals ? Be a vet.”, “you like helping people ? Be a nurse.”. Wonderful ! *Ironic* We are not properly prepared to choose. Personally, I chose to study the law because of strong arguments : “It seems cool, I have no idea what it is but I love Ally McBeal”. Great ! It’s certainly my calling ! *ironic²*
I never became a lawyer obviously.
I wonder why we don’t have more immersions into the world of work before choosing our future studies. I found my first calling when I started to get summer jobs, but I already was at the university. Maybe I could have saved 2 or 3 years of studies with a better system of orientation and a better vision of the working world. I don't say that I regret my choice, I enjoyed studying law (it could have been worse) but finally I never worked in this sector.
A calling can end (and with no happy end)
I’m 30 now, and I have to confess that I haven’t found my calling yet. I thought I did a few years ago. I used to work in HR, specifically in Learning & Development. My job was about finding the proper training to our developers in order to successfully realize their missions and progress in their career. That sounds wonderful ! I was feeling useful for the company and employees, my goals were clear, everything was great.
But, 4 years later, the company has changed and after several reorganizations, my job was more and more psychologically heavy. A lot of complex processes, a constant increase of the workload, more stress, more deadlines and less humanity. I’m in HR (meaning “Human”) ! And I don’t have time to talk to my employees, to help them. I couldn't resign myself to treat employees like numbers. What the hell ?! It doesn’t make any sense. I was stressed, exhausted, depressed, I felt shitty and guilty to not have the time to do all my work. Sometimes I went home at 9p.m. and I was still late in my work. Without surprise, I made a burnout. This wonderful job transformed into a nightmare with no exit. This is how my calling ended.
When people burnout, they often felt guilty, loss of self-confident, they think they have failed. But at the opposite we can see in all interviews the same pattern : a person motivated, passionate who wants to be good in his/her job (not in a competitive way, but in professionalism and human way). We have no reasons to feel guilty about that : being a good employee. We can only be guilty to have wanted to do the better for a company who didn’t care about us and let us die in this awful situation. I say that because burnout causes not only psychological problems like depression but also health problems. To be honest at this time, I also had family problems, it was too hard for me to handle all that mess and I was close to fall in alcoholism. Even if I’m fine today, my body is still suffering physically for all these years of pain.
Change can be hard, but vital
Well, after 2 years of pain, I finally found the courage to find a way out. Finding a new job, a different job in another domain who makes sense to me. I followed training in coding / software development. I know it’s a huge gap between HR and IT but I always loved the IT sector, so why not ?
Today, I successfully got my certificate of developer and I’m looking for a job, but it’s still hard. Corporations don’t want employees with any experience, they don’t want to train them and they are afraid of people with an atypical resume. They want good sheep with high education and high experience. Sometimes, that makes me doubt myself. What if I had chosen the wrong way ? What am I gonna do ? It feels like the society rejects us because we are different, because we didn’t follow the “normal path”. But difference is not a curse, it’s a strength and I truly think innovation needs that diversity.
Do you know that in France, between 6 or 7 employees on 10 say they wish a professional retraining/reskilling. It’s huge ! Why they don’t ? Because all our environment is made to discourage us. A reskilling is very expensive and not all companies want to support those initiatives. If I hadn't got financial support by the French administrations (Fongecif) and my company, I will not be able to realize my training. Then, we know recruiters don’t like atypical profiles, don’t like seniors, don’t like people with no experience, etc. All seems to tell you that there is no hope for you. But that’s wrong. It’s hard yes but not impossible.
Don’t let your job consuming you because, sadly, no one will thank you in the end.
I hope I'll have the opportunity of enjoying my new calling. I keep at it.
Remember, take care of you and think about your well-being.
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